Growing up in an ultra orthodox environment I was taught that a good person is one who davens (prays) everyday, dresses according to jewish law, eats kosher food, runs to put teffilin on people etc.
I failed to learn that looks and appearances mean nothing when it comes to a good person. A parent who ignores their crying child cos they are too busy davening is not a good person. A person who ignores another person because they are too busy serving god is not a good person.
If there is a god and if he is as great as the religious ones make him out to be, surely he will understand if a person has to stop davening or keeping the sabbath or other commandments to help another person. People come first. God can wait. God will understand but a person who has a real need will not understand and can not wait.
One of the main reasons that I became frumless is because I found that my priorities were wrong. I would see parents fasting and then being horrible to their children, people would question if they could call an ambulance for an injured person on sabbath. There were questions where there should not be questions. I decided to drop all the commandments and just focus on being a healthy, happy and kind person.
To be a good person is all that matters to me. When you don’t have all the commandments blurring your view of right and wrong it’s easy to be a good person.